Omega - the end

This is a hard post, and I'm not sure I will do justice to what I, Ve and Mim were feeling on the last day of my visit. As soon as Mim found out I was leaving she started distancing and becoming busy. She was frantically taking apart and putting together puzzles and wouldn't look at me. I could tell Ve knew something was up, but wasn't quite sure as to handle it. I eventually sat down, Ve came and sat on my lap, and finally Mim came over and sat on the arm of the chair.


Ve, not sure as to what is going on


Mim, distancing herself by keeping busy with the puzzles.

Once we were at Marie's saying our Good-byes, the kids started to cry, and Ve clung to my hand. I asked Marie to explain to her that I was leaving and once Marie did, Ve just dropped my hand, and her whole body slumped. Mim was crying and looking away from me. I gave both my girls hugs and kisses, and then turned and left. The kids followed us out, and I started to hear wailing, I turned and looked and it was Mim, on her knees with her arms and head resting on the door making this wailing sound coming from deep within her soul. I have never seen anything like it or felt my heart tear so deeply. She was on the edge emotionally and the only choice I had available to me was to walk away... walk away when what I wanted to do was go back, pull her from the edge of her emotions, take her in my arms and take her home and say I won't leave you ever....but I did leave her and the image of her on the floor against the door has been haunting me ever since. I have sobbed over it many times within the last week.

At this point, Ve is further in the process than Mim...so that means I will more than likely pick Ve up, and yet again leave Mim behind for another 4 - 6 months. Quite honestly, I am not sure I can do that again. I will have to talk with Marie about some other possibilities because right now I am at a loss as to my next move with the girls. I can't leave Mim again, that is all I really know for sure.